Dear Sassy Nation, 

It’s me, Charis, your girlfriend, trusted designer and leader of Sassy Jones. It’s been a while since I’ve wrote one of these love letters to you, and I just want to catch you up on all things Charis, because I’ve not been as present as I once was.

I want to warn you about how raw this letter is, so if you are here for the happy go lucky blonde, go on ahead and press delete now. But if you’re all in with me, keep reading.

Truth is, chile I've been tired. Exhausted is definitely the proper term. Exhausted from achieving, exhausted from therapy, exhausted from trying to fix everything, everyone and most importantly, myself. But F*ck it… I’m no longer participating.

As I’ve crossed 40 years old, there’s been a relentless, ‘As Is’ clause in my life meaning I’ve increased my capability & capacity to accept and see things as they actually are without fantasizing what I’d like them to be or overstepping my personal boundary to rescue everything.

Expending resources to repair broken relationships with family, managing my personal responsibilities and building an empire has been alot. ALOT. So I fired myself as chief people pleaser. And yea babe, I love it here 😂

Let me know if you can relate

I want to reach out to you differently. Not to inspire you to get out of what you may be feeling or encourage you to rise higher today or give you a life changing word that will make it all better.

Right now, I’d rather simply affirm and acknowledge you right where you are. You may be tired, taking care of the world, carrying folks on your shoulders and trying to find the strength to remain standing yourself. 

I just want you to know, I get you.

So how do we continue to build our lives when you may be energetically exhausted? 

Like, how do we manufacture the effort required to sustain when it feels like our bottom fell out underneath us? 

The answer is simple: Energy Budgeting. 

It’s the simple act of investing your energy where you will receive a return and improving on identifying the things that zap you dry without fail. Start to subtract them one by one. Whether it be work, love, relationships, any & everything. Because life ain’t 1 sided.

So if you’re feeling like you are energetically bankrupt, it’s probably because your focus is probably directed toward activities, people and things that are withdrawing from your energetic bank account with little or no repayment. Some of us are even energetically overdrawn. That’s exactly where I’ve been.

So when I took a look at my own life, I literally made a list of the things that led to energetic bankruptcy and left me feeling depleted like a parasite host. And one by one, I started to turn the volume down on those relationships, things and people in my life.

That requires a significant amount of bravery and absolute immediate deployment of that ‘As Is’ clause that we chatted about earlier in this love letter. And since then, everything has been changing for the better and gotten super light. I also thought about all the things that I do that actually manufacture & create energy for myself; meticulously prioritizing the relationships & interactions that literally give me life. 

One of those things that sets my soul on fire is actually talking with you, open floor moments like this and your truthful responses have always kindled my flame. 

We just get one another, us sassy unicorns.

Energy Budgeting

58 comentarios


Charis, I noticed that you were all In to support everybody and everyone. You have given and giveth to all who ask out of the goodness and kindness of your heart. I hate to say it, but people are not looking out for your best interest, whether they are spiritual individuals, family, or friends.
You have said that God has blessed you, and He has, He has also blessed you with a great mind.​ ​A mind where you can determine who is friend or foe,​ aware of the vipers that have crept into your Empire and are trying to make​ their way into your heart.​ Yes, it is time to say NO! ​"​No, I am not in a place to support you at this time, and I’m not sure when I will be again, yet I appreciate you considering me for the opportunity to help​". In other words, the Empire you have built will fall, and those who had their hand out will not be present to help you build it back up. You will look for them, but they will not be there, nowhere to be found.

Someone like you in a position of wealth, said I have two phones, one for my wife,​ children, and a few good friends and one for those who always have their hands out ​(even family)​ ​asking for this and that, to which I respond, “I’m not in a position to help” after a few replies like that, they stop asking and calling, I just helped them to be independent and find their​ way.​

​Charis, You are on the right path, stay there for a good while….No is not a bad word, it is a word needed for survival. A word that You need to survive, and be at peace.

Avis Brown

Thank you for being Transparent, Honest, and Unapologetic! You just described my life. Where I am right now and how I’m feeling in this moment. I’ve been taking care of others for so long and losing myself in the process. Isn’t it funny, how when we finally decide to change the narrative, people look at us as if we’re the problem?!? Well, honey, No More! I made the decision to invest in me! However and whatever that means without apology or explanation. Thank you again for validating the Fierceness within me! God bless your life and legacy.

Anita Coleman

I get it! As my father in law has ministered to me “Self Care is Not Selfish”. You cannot drink from an empty cup, so do what makes you sing. Release what makes you frown and move in your authentic self, unapologically and without excuses or explanations. No is an ENTIRE sentence. Than you for being so transparent and reminding us of our worth.

Carlashoun Washington

LISSSSSEN!!! All of this…. I’m choosing me this time💐


I am happy to see that you are doing SELF CARE. Always remember God first you second and everyone else follows. It is okay to say NO and keep moving. Continue to be a blessing to the world of fashion.

1 2 3 4 5 12

Deje un comentario

Carrito de compras

No hay más productos disponibles para comprar

Su carrito está vacio.